Why so many husbands?
When you travel India with a male friend or companion, it's always best to tell the locals that you are husband and wife because they just don't understand how a man and a woman can share a room and be “just friends”. Over the last six months, a number of husbands have come and gone from my life. Here's an intro to just a few of those who have had the courage to put up with me over long periods of time:
Wayne: Remember Motorcycle India? Wayne's the John Wayne of the Indian highway, the cool dude with the long hair and the Royal Enfield. He's the one with the determined spirit and quest for truth in life. He also talks a lot. We covered about 2000 km together from Goa down to Tirruvananmalai in Tamil Nadu. That's a lot of talking. Wayne is very objective about things, scientific about spirituality and says he couldn't bring himself to bow in front of the giant Buddha in Thailand. He believes in logic and science and it annoys the shit outta me sometimes. He's also very frugal and counts every rupee. Has a good sense of humor but the ability to drain you with his energy for talking, talking, talking. Yet one of the best things about Wayne was that he was aware and would occasionally wake up me up mid-conversation to ask me, "are you drifting away again Anu?" - and I'd tell him that he was sapping - but he took it like a soldier. He also made me aware of a few things myself, such as my short temper and ability to lose rag with Indians. He's a super-patient, chilled out, good natured, solid guy, not to mention the best motorcyclist that I have met(well, the only one really, but I can't imagine many people handling the roads as well as he did). We had a super-cool motorcycle adventure with lots of laughs. I put up with his crusty hippy ways and stinky feet and he put up with me. We lasted about six weeks until it was time to go our separate ways: I took off for Goa, followed by Rajasthan, and he delved deeper into the south to Kodai Kanal...
Josep: I rode on the back of Wayne's bike to Hampi and met Josep, only to discover that I had suddenly accumulated two husbands at the same time. Josep became my partner in crime for the next two months. We hit Anantapur to check out the Vicente Ferrer Foundation and were joined by my third husband Joachim. Josep speaks little English and finds my Spanish highly comical and entertaining, but I too ripped the piss out of him: “Is possible mushroom soup, but don't garlic and don't onion!!!! Hokay?” and “One cock please.” and “I saw,I saw” (meaning, it's the same, it's the same). Josep's a legend and bags of fun to travel with. He had total respect for me and knew when to leave me alone by giving me my space. He was also very patient ands tolerated me when I'd take an eternity to get ready, get out of bed or leave the room to go out. I felt like a princess with my breakfast joint and coffee every other morning.
Josep has been working as a journalist in Catalan for the last 35 year and had the sudden inclination to leave his two ex wives and four kids behind for about five months to find space for himself for a change in life. As a result he's the happiest he's ever been. He sees joke in everything. He told me Vicente Ferrer, the founder of the NGO that we went to visit, was dead. Well, that was my interpretation of the rapid Spanish he spoke to me on the phone at the time anyway. I send an email of condolence to the wife of the deceased only to discover the deceased is not deceased. Need I say more…?
Me and Josep spent most of our time laughing. He saw epic dimensions in everything we experienced. His interpretation, vision, translation and analysis of everything was spot on and hilarious at the same time. He's my tio perverto, my dirty old uncle, my tio sucio with his dry sense of humour and ability to laugh until the tears are literally streaming down his face. He takes everything in his stride and we danced, drank, smoked and partied - mainly to Frank Zappa and the Doors. Vodka, gin, rum and beer; spliffs and cigarettes, we had a laugh. We made a music video in Manali and if you see it when I email it to you, you'll know just what I mean... lol :-)
Joachim: Yes, it's gotta be said, that Joachim is a bit of a hottie, and guess what? He thinks he knows it too! At the same time he's very sweet and introspective and takes it like a man when I take the piss out of his macho exterior. Our connection was magnetic, probably because we both have ability to charm the other while remaining cheeky and sarcastic at the same time. He thinks he can have his cake and eat it, but I think I've managed to stick a mirror to his face and made him realise a few things about himself. Joachim is an ex-boxer and creative carpenter from Norway. He was inspired to join me and Josep on our next adventure. Despite out flirtatious connection, I stayed well clear of falling for his charming ways, yet at the same time, I also found it fun to humor him! From Hampi to Anantapur and then on to Bangalore, linking again in Rajasthan and traveling to Delhi – that was the breadth of the journey we traveled together. He's a Libra and I'm a Saggitarious, so true to the nature of our star signs, it was a case of “should we shouldn't we” - which made for great entertainment. But did we or didn't we...? What I can say is that we had lots of stomach-clenching laughs, plenty of reflective conversations, and an experience of India, that together with Wayne and Josep, we won't ever forget. He's certainly found a friend in me.
Francisco: Josep left me in Rishikesh as he was heading back down to Rajasthan for a few days before getting on the choo-choo down to Mumbai to catch flight back to Spain. I was sad and tearful to see him go, but it was time to move on and I know that we will link again in the not-too-distant future. So my new husband comes in the form of Francisco, an Argentinean lawyer and football player from Buenas Aires. A gentleman in the truest sense of the word, I am nothing less than a princess for Francisco. Me and Josep hung out with him for about 10 days in Dharamasala and he joined us on the trip to Rishikesh. So I guess it's just the two of us - and he makes a fine speciman of a husband indeed. Sometimes he's my adopted brother, rescued from the slums by my parents and given a home. But most of the time, he's my husband. Our lawyer-journalist status gets us places, especially across the Nepalese border when it was still closed. Traveling with Francisco for a few weeks made me realise a lot of things about myself. He stuck a mirror to my face and helped me become more aware of the things that I try not to face about myself. For example, the fact that I can be a nasty bitch at times, ability to lose temper and my lack of patience. He's a real angel, a gentle soul and sees the best in people. Francisco brings me coffee in bed and will go out and buy the food for midnight snacks. He also tried to help me get my camera back, confronting the evil junkie, Karma, in Dharamasala. Francisco is a sweetie that's probably a lot more clued up than I ever was at his age. He's a great travel companion and we get along just fine!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
Himachal Pradesh - up in the mountains!
Warm me up Scotty!
Brrrrrrr! It's cold! I'm wearing about four layers and I'm going to bed with the same layers for the last two nights now. It's freezing and it was freezing the night I arrived. From the sun-drenched mayhem we experienced during Holi in Pushkar to the cold, rainy Himalayan climate - it's an exhilarating contrast and I love it!
Busin it...
Bus journey from Amritsar to Manali epic. Flew off seat on countless occasions, was squashed into window with rucksack on top of me, zip on bag broke, crumbs everywhere, snoozed in awkward positions, smoked in secret, tried to avoid conversations with dodgy men, took 18-hours and three buses to get there... (moan, moan, moan)... Anyway - I made it. Manali is stunning. The Himalayas frame the valley we are in. There are plantations behind the mountain and it tastes good brother, it tastes real good. Fresh mountain air... Boy, I never knew I missed it so much...
Adding havoc to havoc
Josep was totally surprised when I turned up out the blue during the small hours of the night. Think he'd given up on me turning up at all. We're sharing room and it's costing 125 rupees each. There's hot water but it stays hot for five minutes. We're both unorganised and the room's a fucking mess. I arrive and add havoc to havoc. Empty cigarette packets, bottles of beer, books, bags, scarves, toileteries, computers, hard drives, speakers, wires, cables, an avalanche of clothes all over the place.
Manali was fun but three days was enough. Novelty of rain wore off on second day so we took off for Dharamsala.
Fifty Years in Exile
Monks with mobiles and youngsters in bling, this is the image of Tibetans in the exiled capital of Tibet today.
Save Tibet – a great marketing tool for the Indian government, has been churning in top dollar. Dalai Lama's approach towards the cultural genocide has won the hearts and minds of the world, his teachings of Buddhist philosohies have changed the lives of millions. This has been the effect of the Tibetan people on the world and Buddhism has carried them there. It's a powerful thing and the Chinese are threatened by it. The Tibetans are the nomads of the world, but the world is taking care of them and will continue to take care of them as long as Buddhism continues to influence the lives of people. It's crazy but it's true. People need love, salvation, peace, truth in the world they live in, it's like medication and you don't even need to take huge doses of it, just whatever works for you. Plenty of people come to India and take the best of all the things that have had an impact on them and Buddhism is one of the main ones. It's a driver of pure humanitarian instinct. This plus the reality of what is happening to Tibetans is enough to get the people of the world behind the plight to Save Tibet. It is not the governments of the world, but the people, that are carrying Tibetans in exile.
Loadsa money
At the same time, all the money coming into Dharamsala has turned it into a mega tourist spot. The Indian government have won a lifetime lottery and the locals in the area are making a nice little earner too selling everything from Save Tibet memorobilia and mantra pendants to yak bone malas and bronze Buddha statues – they got it all. Gotta watch out for the silver, but it's great to go shopping and look for unique little gems. Plenty of people are donating profits to the Tibetan fund but it's also driving the local economy, and Dharamasala remains the most affluent place in Himachal Pradesh where Tibetans here are even better off than Indians. Monks with mobiles and youngsters in bling, this is the image of Tibetans in the exiled capital of Tibet today.
World reflections
People in McCleod Ganj, the central hub, are a reflection of the people that come here from across the world. Met a rastafarian from Panama who speaks fluent Tibetan, a Swedish couple that have funded a school, a Buddhist philosophy student, an English guy who has been meditating in the mountains for the last eight years and a load of people doing English conversation sessions with Tibetans at a place called Hope.
Plenty come here to relieve themselves of their guilty lives and leave once they feel the burden lift. It's also a bit of a rehab centre for the travellers that head up here from Goa and then there's the touristy folk – but nice kind of touristy folk. How can any of these people have any idea what the Tibetans are going through when they haven't lived it? You can see this feeling in the hardened eyes of the older generation of exiled Tibetans - the fifties to seventies in particular. They are not a freakshow so don't mock them with your camera. Don't be a stupid tourist. You can also detect this feeling amongst the rebellious, street-talking, underground younger lot with their bling jewellery, bomber jackets, spiky hair and pockets full of rizzlas and smokes. If they haven't taken on the Indian habit of asking you lots of questions and being overly nice, they see you with timid or alien eyes and look right through you because they know that they will never be what you are. Others befriend the westerners, marry them, get involved in business deals or get into the cultural exchange thing and all that jazz.
What’s left? What's next?
A museum: That's all that's left of Tibet, and the 40% of historical artifacts that were saved from demolition are housed within it. From those that follow the Dalai Lama's peaceful and submissive approach, to young radicals such as south India-based Tibetan journalist, Tsong Tumin*. “The younger generation is not as tolerant, spiritual, or as religious as their parents and grandparents,” he says. “When the Dalai Lama is gone (touches his heart), it's gonna get dangerous. Tibetans will become terrorists, the Himalayan snow will become scarlet red with blood.” Tsong is working with a radio station that telecasts news to Tibetans in Tibet directly from India. He tries to put it in simple terms, “If somebody invades your home, you're not going to just sit there and watch them.” He tells me, “...all we want is our rights as written within the Constitutions of 1954 and 1982 - but they don't want this because these are rights that will empower the Tibetan people in Tibet”.
Acceptance is freedom within Buddhist philosophy as he explains, “We accept the situation. We know Tibet will never be free of China and we are happy to co-exist as brothers.” The Chinese government however, is more in tune with the differences between them and Tsong recognises this. “It's a fight because we are seperate from them, we are too different in terms of spirituality and religion, in perspectives, culture, history, everything. But past is past to us, we are saying it's time to move on, but instead what we are dealing with here is a cultural genocide - and something amongst the younger exiled communities in India is gonna have to give.”
Saving gRace
The Tibetan race outside of Tibet is being dispersed into the world as more and more get past the border. There are about six million Tibetans living in Tibet, most of them nomads or farmers, while the ones that learn Chinese and study, are still left with little opportunity - unless they collaborate in some way or other.There are also plenty of mixed marriages between Chinese and Tibetans and the numbers are shrinking.
Amongst the exiled community, while plenty of communities believe in the preservation of the Tibetan race, many find ways of getting out of their refugee status by marrying westerners. It's often the Tibetan men take this kind of plunge to personal freedom, although I did meet Tsering in Goa, a Tibetan refugee who lives in Canada and is about to set up shack in Vancouver with her Spanish boyfriend. Also met lots of Tibetans in Dharamasala that have not seen their families in years, including Karma, who left Tibet seven years and Tsong, who left in 1992 and has a brother in Italy.
Dealing with the shit
Fifty years of exile has spawned a generation of people that continue to believe in their faith, while others hear the rebel yell from ancestors of a once-violent Tibet. Then you get the funky young Tibetan DJs who are totally integrated and have found a way of releasing the pressure. The Mountain Madness Festival in Nepal takes place this month and the line-up of DJs is predominantly Indian, Nepalese and Tibetan. According to Shiv Link Records' DJ Appy, “There's a cool fusion between younger generation Indians and Tibetans. The Tibetan guys are playing at psytrance events that are happening across India. They're inspired by something that is taking them in another direction.”
Tibet is trapped between two super-powers armed up to eyeballs with nuclear weapons. To create a warzone within the Himalayas is the last thing they would want to do. The Chinese and Indians have finally established a relationship based on respect. Aggravate this and it will not take the Indians a second to send the exiled community packing. The real concern lies with the six million Tibetans living in Tibet because they are trapped between the pride of staying and that of risking their lives to leave. In the meantime, they’re in hell.
India: A land of opportunity for the exiled community?
For those in exile, India has become a land of opportunity. Fifty years of living in exile has transformed them into a tourist attraction, something that many have easily exploited. Monks wear the latest trainers and young rebels have defined a new way of life and are unleashing their frustrations in different ways. Acceptance is freedom and if any race can master this approach to life, then it's the Tibetan people. Life after the DL in the future will change things. Many young people are not as tolerant, and as Tsong says, "something's gonna give". It's gonna be a long road to freedom...
Brrrrrrr! It's cold! I'm wearing about four layers and I'm going to bed with the same layers for the last two nights now. It's freezing and it was freezing the night I arrived. From the sun-drenched mayhem we experienced during Holi in Pushkar to the cold, rainy Himalayan climate - it's an exhilarating contrast and I love it!
Busin it...
Bus journey from Amritsar to Manali epic. Flew off seat on countless occasions, was squashed into window with rucksack on top of me, zip on bag broke, crumbs everywhere, snoozed in awkward positions, smoked in secret, tried to avoid conversations with dodgy men, took 18-hours and three buses to get there... (moan, moan, moan)... Anyway - I made it. Manali is stunning. The Himalayas frame the valley we are in. There are plantations behind the mountain and it tastes good brother, it tastes real good. Fresh mountain air... Boy, I never knew I missed it so much...
Adding havoc to havoc
Josep was totally surprised when I turned up out the blue during the small hours of the night. Think he'd given up on me turning up at all. We're sharing room and it's costing 125 rupees each. There's hot water but it stays hot for five minutes. We're both unorganised and the room's a fucking mess. I arrive and add havoc to havoc. Empty cigarette packets, bottles of beer, books, bags, scarves, toileteries, computers, hard drives, speakers, wires, cables, an avalanche of clothes all over the place.
Manali was fun but three days was enough. Novelty of rain wore off on second day so we took off for Dharamsala.
Fifty Years in Exile
Monks with mobiles and youngsters in bling, this is the image of Tibetans in the exiled capital of Tibet today.
Save Tibet – a great marketing tool for the Indian government, has been churning in top dollar. Dalai Lama's approach towards the cultural genocide has won the hearts and minds of the world, his teachings of Buddhist philosohies have changed the lives of millions. This has been the effect of the Tibetan people on the world and Buddhism has carried them there. It's a powerful thing and the Chinese are threatened by it. The Tibetans are the nomads of the world, but the world is taking care of them and will continue to take care of them as long as Buddhism continues to influence the lives of people. It's crazy but it's true. People need love, salvation, peace, truth in the world they live in, it's like medication and you don't even need to take huge doses of it, just whatever works for you. Plenty of people come to India and take the best of all the things that have had an impact on them and Buddhism is one of the main ones. It's a driver of pure humanitarian instinct. This plus the reality of what is happening to Tibetans is enough to get the people of the world behind the plight to Save Tibet. It is not the governments of the world, but the people, that are carrying Tibetans in exile.
Loadsa money
At the same time, all the money coming into Dharamsala has turned it into a mega tourist spot. The Indian government have won a lifetime lottery and the locals in the area are making a nice little earner too selling everything from Save Tibet memorobilia and mantra pendants to yak bone malas and bronze Buddha statues – they got it all. Gotta watch out for the silver, but it's great to go shopping and look for unique little gems. Plenty of people are donating profits to the Tibetan fund but it's also driving the local economy, and Dharamasala remains the most affluent place in Himachal Pradesh where Tibetans here are even better off than Indians. Monks with mobiles and youngsters in bling, this is the image of Tibetans in the exiled capital of Tibet today.
World reflections
People in McCleod Ganj, the central hub, are a reflection of the people that come here from across the world. Met a rastafarian from Panama who speaks fluent Tibetan, a Swedish couple that have funded a school, a Buddhist philosophy student, an English guy who has been meditating in the mountains for the last eight years and a load of people doing English conversation sessions with Tibetans at a place called Hope.
Plenty come here to relieve themselves of their guilty lives and leave once they feel the burden lift. It's also a bit of a rehab centre for the travellers that head up here from Goa and then there's the touristy folk – but nice kind of touristy folk. How can any of these people have any idea what the Tibetans are going through when they haven't lived it? You can see this feeling in the hardened eyes of the older generation of exiled Tibetans - the fifties to seventies in particular. They are not a freakshow so don't mock them with your camera. Don't be a stupid tourist. You can also detect this feeling amongst the rebellious, street-talking, underground younger lot with their bling jewellery, bomber jackets, spiky hair and pockets full of rizzlas and smokes. If they haven't taken on the Indian habit of asking you lots of questions and being overly nice, they see you with timid or alien eyes and look right through you because they know that they will never be what you are. Others befriend the westerners, marry them, get involved in business deals or get into the cultural exchange thing and all that jazz.
What’s left? What's next?
A museum: That's all that's left of Tibet, and the 40% of historical artifacts that were saved from demolition are housed within it. From those that follow the Dalai Lama's peaceful and submissive approach, to young radicals such as south India-based Tibetan journalist, Tsong Tumin*. “The younger generation is not as tolerant, spiritual, or as religious as their parents and grandparents,” he says. “When the Dalai Lama is gone (touches his heart), it's gonna get dangerous. Tibetans will become terrorists, the Himalayan snow will become scarlet red with blood.” Tsong is working with a radio station that telecasts news to Tibetans in Tibet directly from India. He tries to put it in simple terms, “If somebody invades your home, you're not going to just sit there and watch them.” He tells me, “...all we want is our rights as written within the Constitutions of 1954 and 1982 - but they don't want this because these are rights that will empower the Tibetan people in Tibet”.
Acceptance is freedom within Buddhist philosophy as he explains, “We accept the situation. We know Tibet will never be free of China and we are happy to co-exist as brothers.” The Chinese government however, is more in tune with the differences between them and Tsong recognises this. “It's a fight because we are seperate from them, we are too different in terms of spirituality and religion, in perspectives, culture, history, everything. But past is past to us, we are saying it's time to move on, but instead what we are dealing with here is a cultural genocide - and something amongst the younger exiled communities in India is gonna have to give.”
Saving gRace
The Tibetan race outside of Tibet is being dispersed into the world as more and more get past the border. There are about six million Tibetans living in Tibet, most of them nomads or farmers, while the ones that learn Chinese and study, are still left with little opportunity - unless they collaborate in some way or other.There are also plenty of mixed marriages between Chinese and Tibetans and the numbers are shrinking.
Amongst the exiled community, while plenty of communities believe in the preservation of the Tibetan race, many find ways of getting out of their refugee status by marrying westerners. It's often the Tibetan men take this kind of plunge to personal freedom, although I did meet Tsering in Goa, a Tibetan refugee who lives in Canada and is about to set up shack in Vancouver with her Spanish boyfriend. Also met lots of Tibetans in Dharamasala that have not seen their families in years, including Karma, who left Tibet seven years and Tsong, who left in 1992 and has a brother in Italy.
Dealing with the shit
Fifty years of exile has spawned a generation of people that continue to believe in their faith, while others hear the rebel yell from ancestors of a once-violent Tibet. Then you get the funky young Tibetan DJs who are totally integrated and have found a way of releasing the pressure. The Mountain Madness Festival in Nepal takes place this month and the line-up of DJs is predominantly Indian, Nepalese and Tibetan. According to Shiv Link Records' DJ Appy, “There's a cool fusion between younger generation Indians and Tibetans. The Tibetan guys are playing at psytrance events that are happening across India. They're inspired by something that is taking them in another direction.”
Tibet is trapped between two super-powers armed up to eyeballs with nuclear weapons. To create a warzone within the Himalayas is the last thing they would want to do. The Chinese and Indians have finally established a relationship based on respect. Aggravate this and it will not take the Indians a second to send the exiled community packing. The real concern lies with the six million Tibetans living in Tibet because they are trapped between the pride of staying and that of risking their lives to leave. In the meantime, they’re in hell.
India: A land of opportunity for the exiled community?
For those in exile, India has become a land of opportunity. Fifty years of living in exile has transformed them into a tourist attraction, something that many have easily exploited. Monks wear the latest trainers and young rebels have defined a new way of life and are unleashing their frustrations in different ways. Acceptance is freedom and if any race can master this approach to life, then it's the Tibetan people. Life after the DL in the future will change things. Many young people are not as tolerant, and as Tsong says, "something's gonna give". It's gonna be a long road to freedom...
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