Uncle Nepal!

The thought of traveling three-hours by donkey cart to happy clappy doo-dah was too much, so me and Francisco gave the Rainbow Gathering a miss and made a beeline for the Nepalese border instead.

Emiliano the Universal Wanderer
We met Emiliano along the way. He's a wannabe baba and a lost soul from Mexico who spent days walking barefoot around the jungle. Emiliano made a spontaneous decision to come with us to Nepal. Spiritual about everything, he leaves everything in the hands of the universe and floats about with a romantic vision of the world. I think at times, his approach does get the better of him and this was one of those times because we discovered he was completely strapped for cash. We helped him as much as we could and I advised him to take care of himself because the universe will not get rid of that gangerine on his foot! Emiliano is a very special person and it hurt me to see him hurting himself like this. So I took him to the doctor to get him fixed and left him at the border. Maika, a German girl I recently traveled with said that if our connection is profound enough, we will meet at least twice. I hope that one day I get to meet Emiliano again.

David the Psychedelic Canadian
With his bright psychedelic shirts and dry sense of humour, David the psychedelic Canadian was a comical character to travel with. We spent the best part of a week with David and did nothing but laugh, smoke and joke at everything we saw. He does these mean impressions of Borat and we spent most of the time being silly. He has a great sense of humour and found my version of the Canadian national anthem to be highly amusing! David is 45-years old and imports leather jackets from Thailand for Harley Davidson freaks in Canada. He's also into jewellery and seems to know his stuff. He was highly enthusiastic about taking us to a strip club in Kathamandu. I was totally up for it, but to David's disapointment, the novelty wore off, so we ended up at a Nepalese dancing girls club instead.

Nepal – the up side
People
The people are beautiful, they smile from the heart, and they are kind, genererous and helpful. You could say the people of Nepal are “same-same but different” to Indians - meaning they say yes to everything and are so polite that they wouldn't dare offend you by telling you that they don't know, prefering to send you off in the wrong direction instead! It's adorable but can get on your goat, so after some time, you learn to pressure them politely into admitting whether they really do mean yes or no when they give that wobble of the head.

Kathamandu
A concentrated bubble of intensity, Kathamandu is like a toned down version of Bangkok. With its “shower bars”, stripper joints and dancing girls clubs, it has a seedy charm and by night, all you hear is the sound of live rock music blaring from bars and pubs. Everything shuts by around 11pm, but there are some pretty cool joints to go hang out. Kathamandu is brimming with life in the daytime too but you find yourself dodging traffic every second you walk down the street. It's chaos personified, but if you've seen Delhi, then this really is nothing!

The rest...
Nepal really is a very beautiful place. The scenery is pure magic and you will be glued to the window as your bus journeys through the mountains, bringing you views of sweeping valleys, gorges, powerful rivers and a voluptuous landscape. There's also plenty of adventure sports, jungle safaris, elephant bathtime, lots of Buddhist stupas, great shopping and nice smokes.

Nepal – on the down side
What do in Kathamandu?
First and foremost: the power cuts! What to in Kathamandu? No power no shower, 24 hour! Now I know why they say this! It goes off about 9pm every night and the city is overcome with darkness, bringing out many a dodgy dude. The vampires come out at night, but even they have a curfew with the streets so quiet by 11pm, that you could hear the sound of a pin drop.

Expensive
You have to pay for everything in Nepal, so in a word, Nepal is EXPENSIVE. At $25 and $50 for a two and four week visa respectively, it costs top dollar just to stay in the country. Kathamandu, Bandipur, Pokhara, Everest, Anapurna, Chitwan – these are the main tourist areas and everything within them is geared up for tourists with too much money and not enough time - once again, making Nepal an expensive destination for the discerning traveler. Guide books for going off the beaten track are crap. You could probably do it though, but it's worth getting friendly with some of the locals to check out the best spots first.

If you want to see the Himalayan range, then you pay for the Anapurna Trek, the Everest Base Camp trek and other treks, so it's a bit like paying just to be in the nature. Small villages such as Bandipur have become top tourist destinations for trainspotter trekker types. In fact we spent a good amount of time taking the piss out specky anaraks in sensible walking shoes and baseball caps (worn back to front).

Small and quaint, Bandipur is home to the Newari tribes of Nepal, but it seems that alongside the guesthouses, restaurants and cafes, they too have become part of the tourist attraction.

Unless you like trekking or adventure sports, there's not really much to do in Nepal. Adrenalin junkies will love how white water rafting, abseiling, canyoning, paragliding etc is available on tap, but once again... it'll cost you top dollar baby!

At bars, cafes and restaurants, they add a 10% service charge, V AT and TAX. You also have to pay to enter various squares around the main city of Kathamandu, and the food is plastic tourist shit that costs a shit load of money.

Political climate
The political situation has been volatile in Nepal for the last decade. The current climate is prone to road blocks and mass Maoist demonstrations, so like me, you could find yourself stuck on a bus for eight hours, and sharing a seat with nine others in the baking heat because some idiot has decided to park his truck across the road. Nepal is probably the only country in the world with two armies and the Maoists and government are currently in cahoots over power, revealing the levels of corruption in the country.